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[手放す] FINAL: Closing the Last Door / Loss, Love and Lost Love

Title: Closing the Last Door
Author: Kira Shadow
Rating: PG-15
Fandom: JE
Genre: AU, Angst
Pairing: Tsubasa and Takizawa
Warnings: DEATH, dark-ish, some mentions of war/battle and violence
Notes: Tebanasu's final Arc.

Summary:
手放す: to part with; to release; to relinquish; to send away
A person must learn to let go of certain things if he wishes to move forward.

It's every man's desire to be able to put an end to the last chapter of one's life himself. Coming to a close means to have lived a fulfilled life and to leave with no regrets.
(For more of the universe, click here.)



"When the old woman at the market place looked into your future and said it would end bloody and dramatically...I'm sure you were expecting something quite different from this, weren't you, Hide-kun?" the lean figure of Tsubasa appeared by the door closest to Takizawa.

Takizawa had just laid Taisuke's lifeless body down next to Kitayama's and had draped a blanket over them with a silent prayer. He looked up when he saw Tsubasa by the door. "Tsubasa..."

The other smiled wryly, "Just like Taisuke...there are things that I just cannot forget about you, Hide-kun. The way you say my name...that look in your eyes..."

"If you were listening to all of it, why didn't you get any help!" Takizawa rose from the ground and stepped closer to Tsubasa. "Why did you just let Taisuke die? I thought you liked him, too! You always treated him like a little brother..."

Tsubasa gave Takizawa a small smile, "...because I'm selfish, Hide-kun..." He looked down at the covered bodies and then back at Takizawa. "He was indeed like a little brother for me but those feelings weren't strong enough in the end. Just like your feelings did not reach him any more... or maybe, just a little...when it was already too late."

"Tsuba.....sa...?!" Takizawa stared at the other.

"I told you I was selfish...and I just reminded you of the future the old woman tell you...that your end would be bloody...and dramatic...because that's just like you..." Tsubasa smiled. "I'll follow you soon, Hide-kun...don't worry. We made an oath that it would always be the two of us together, right? You haven't forgotten about it...?"

"I remember..." Takizawa sunk down, guided by Tsubasa and came to lie in the other's arms.

Stroking Takizawa's hair,Tsubasa knelt on the floor, holding the lord close to him as he watched as the life drained out of the other slowly. "You don't need to apologize...I knew what was going on...I had known all along. I left, knowing that I would be able to come back one day and reclaim my place by your side...I knew that no matter what, in the end it would always be me next to you." He leaned down to kiss the other gently, lovingly.

"Do you remember, Hide-kun? How we first met here...and didn't get along at all? How we would pick fights every time we did see each other? Despite the fact that you were the heir and I was but a mere servant we treated us as equals..." Tsubasa kept stroking Takizawa's hair. "And then I started to dance when I got older...and you would come and peek through the door to watch me...falling in love with my dancing and then with me. The night you took me to your bed was the night you became of age...the night you took over the castle as its lord..."

He held Takizawa closer. "Let's dance together in the afterlife, alright? After I have been judged for doing this...let's meet again and fall in love..."

"...I never stopped loving you, Tsubasa..." Takizawa's breath was shallow and weak. "Never..."

It was then that the other drew his last breath and quietly 'fell asleep' in Tsubasa's arms. The older male smiled wistfully and kissed the still warm lips once more. "Wait for me just a little longer, Hide-kun..." Tsubasa pulled out a knife from the folds of his garments and unsheathed it.

After pulling down his clothes to expose his abdomen, he took a deep breath and ended his own life, body dropping down onto Takizawa's as he fell over, lifeless.

The last thing Tsubasa heard was the sound of footsteps coming closer. Without a doubt, chaos would break out at the castle. But none of them would be there to witness it. Frankly, he did not care about what happened from now on. His life was over, his wishes had been fulfilled. He was moving on. Somebody was waiting for him on the other side.




Title: Loss, Love and Lost Love
Author: Kira Shadow, Shattered Tenshi
Rating: PG-15
Fandom: JE
Genre: AU, Angst
Pairing: one-sided Senga + Taisuke, one-sided Nikaido + Senga
Warnings: DEATH, dark-ish, some mentions of war/battle and violence
Notes: Tebanasu's final installment[手放す] Words Piercing Your Heart Like Arrows.

Summary:
手放す: to part with; to release; to relinquish; to send away
A person must learn to let go of certain things if he wishes to move forward.

You gain and you lose. You let go of one hand to take another. This is how life goes.
(For more of the universe, click here.)




Kento was stopped by a guard, asking if he knew where Tono might be. Kento could only shake his head though. His mind was occupied, thinking about Taisuke, how they were together in one place again. He didn't think that he would be able to see Taisuke again so soon and what he really wanted to do was to find Taisuke as soon as possible and spend time with the other. He had to of course spend some time, trying to calm down first, recalling his last conversation with Taisuke and what the other told him.

He didn't want Taisuke to drift away from him again. Kento just wanted to spend time with Taisuke, so he knew he had to resist trying to ask the other to dance with him again.

He couldn't refuse the guard's request though and decided to search for Tono with him first before going to look for Taisuke.

They eventually reached one of the rooms, thinking they heard some voices inside.

Kento was the first to walk into the room and he immediately covered his mouth with his hand at the sight, his face paling. "T-Tono...!"

Seeing Tono dead with a few more other people in the room, the guard had immediately run off.

Shaking as he took a step forward, Kento was about to reach out to Tono when he noticed who else was in the room.

"T-Taisuke!" Kento screamed, running to the other's side and pulling the other up into his arms. He could feel even more blood leaving his face when he realized that Taisuke's body was cold. "N-no...how did this...Taisuke!"



Outside the room, the sounds of fighting grew louder and were now joined by the acrid smell of fire. The castle was burning. The sound of running came closer to the room and Nikaido stuck his head in, looking franctic, panicked. "Kento!"

Kento didn't hear Nikaido though, just hugging Taisuke's body. How could the other be lying lifeless in his arms when he could still recall the other's smiles, the other's warmth? He refused to believe this was happening. Taisuke wouldn't die like this! Why did Taisuke die in the first anyway? Why? Taisuke didn't deserve this.

Nikaido took in the situation and tried to comprehend it but found that he couldn't. He understood though why the castle had suddenly broken into chaos. "Kento, we need to leave here! Or we'll both be killed, too!" he went over and tried to tug on the other's sleeve.

"No!" Kento screamed. "I'm not going to leave Taisuke alone here! He doesn't deserve dying like this! Taisuke...Taisuke, he...!" Tears started to flow from Kento's eyes.

"He's already dead, Kento...there's nothing we can do anymore! If he were still alive though, I'm sure he wouldn't want YOU to die here and now either and would rather know you safe!" he pointed out, keeping an eye on the door. "We need to leave, Kento...or we'll either be burned alive or killed before we can make it out! People are fighting everywhere!"

"But, Taisuke...Taisuke, he...!" Kento buried his face against Taisuke's neck, not caring his closeness with the other meant getting blood on his own clothes.

"Please Kento, I beg of you!" Nikaido got onto his knees. "Please come with me...I don't want you to die here as well...I promised...I swore I'd take care of you!"

"Promised?" Kento whispered, tightening his hold on Taisuke.

"Yes...I did..." his grip on the other stayed firm. "Please, Kento...I mean...how...how would staying here help Taisuke now? He'll be mad...looking down from wherever he is now!"

Kento looked up, tears staining his face. "Will he really? Taisuke...Taisuke should be smiling...he looks so much better smiling..." He reached down to stroke Taisuke's cold cheek.

"He won't be smiling at all when he finds out you got yourself killed here as well...come on, Kento, we need to go!" Nikaido urged.

Letting out a hiccup between sobs, Kento trembled as he leaned down to press a kiss on Taisuke's lips. "Taisuke...Taisuke, I love you..."

The fighting sounds were getting louder and Nikaido could hear people shouting as well. When Kento seemed to be done with saying goodbye, he pulled the other up and just dragged the younger male along and out with him. His grip was firm, not allowing the other to break away and go back. Flames started to block the passage behind them soon after they left it.

"Taisuke...!" Kento let out another scream, but they only moved further and further away from the room.

Somehow they made it to the stables and Nikaido pulled the other up onto a horse with him, "Hold on tight, Kento..." They broke through the chaos and fled the castle. It was starting to disappear in smoke and flames behind them.

Kento could only kept crying. Things happened too suddenly and all he knew was that he lost the one who was most important to him in a moment and had to even leave the other's body behind. He had nothing to remind himself of Taisuke except for the anklet that he was still wearing.

They were leaving the castle, but perhaps, it would take a long time before his heart would leave that place as well.



And that it did. Days turned into weeks, weeks into months and months into years. The day they had left the castle behind, Nikaido had brought them down to the farmlands where Koki resided, who greeted them worriedly. Word had spread already and the man was glad to see his friends from the castle safe. Nikaido had been surprised but also relieved to find Yokoo in Koki's kitchen as well, injured but not mortally so. Sitting next to a completely silent and mentally absent Kento, Nikaido had brought the news of the death of not only the lord but also those around him, the scene he had found in the room where he had found Kento.

Yokoo and Koki had been shocked of course but although things made sense now, all the fighting and the chaos. Koki offered them to make a small altar in his house to pray for their deceased friends, hoping that it would give them some comfort. Especially Kento, who still wasn't reacting even after having stayed at Koki's place for a couple of days.

It took all of Nikaido's effort to get him to eat and drink and take care of himself somehow, bathe, sleep. The young dancer was like a walking dead person. He'd spend most of his time kneeling by the altar quietly, staring at the drawings Koki had put up - being an apt painter.

Nikaido was always by Kento's side. No matter what. Of course he would go out and work from time to time because they couldn't freeload and burden Koki forever but every other minute he would spend next to Kento, talking to the other quietly, holding him or just being there. He never got any reaction really but he didn't stop. After all, it had always been like this. Nikaido had been watching over the other quietly, loved him from afar.

Things had continued like this for a while, until Kento started to pick up some simple tasks again by himself, like eating and cleaning himself. He and Nikaido soon left to live in a different place, with Nikaido working to earn them money to survive. They didn't need much.

Around them, the country started to change. The revolution at the castle had blown over and peace had returned to their lands. Whatever had happened in detail didn't really reach the people in the village here, their main concern being to just survive from day to day.


It was on a warm summer's night when Nikaido returned from a hard day of work on the fields that he spotted movement inside their house. Sliding the door open, his eyes widened a bit at what he saw. Kento was dancing. There was only limited space in their humble abode but still the other was dancing. How many years had it been? He had lost count.

"Kento...!" Nikaido just stared.

"Ah, welcome home, Nikaido-kun..." Kento greeted him with a small smile.

Nikaido walked inside, discarding whatever he had been carrying and hugged the other. It had been so long...so long since he had heard Kento's voice, seen the other's smile.

"Why now?" he asked.

"...Taisuke would dance..." Kento replied softly. "Taisuke would dance...and smile...no matter what happened...so I will, too." He laid his head onto Nikaido's shoulder. "...thank you Nikaido-kun, for taking care of me."

"You don't have to thank me for that, idiot...I didn't do it because I had to...because I wanted to...still want to..." Nikaido replied.

Kento smiled again, "I'm sorry I cannot return your feelings..."

Nikaido just shook his head, "It's o-" before he could say anything, Kento's fingers on his lips stopped him mid-sentence. The other shook his head.

"I didn't finish yet," the dancer scolded him. "I'm sorry I cannot return your feelings now...but maybe in the future I will be."


~The End~




A/N: Posting the last two installments together because they're not that long, to spare your f-lists a bit and keep things in order. Thank you for reading the Tebanasu Fics :) I hope you enjoyed reading them as much as we enjoyed writing them. There was a long break in between but sometimes life just gets the better of you.
Tags: author: kaji and kira, author: kira, group: kis-my-ft2, pairing: nikaido x senga, pairing: senga x fujigaya, pairing: takizawa x imai, universe: tebanasu
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